The Race Must Go On...

I've never been a runner. Ever. When I was in track (shot put and disc), I would hide behind the stands until the team came around the final leg of the warm-up lap.


At the gym, the last piece of equipment I EVER decided to use was the treadmill.

One day I woke up and decided I wanted to run a half marathon. With no background or love for running, this was an odd dream to suddenly develop.

But I saw one of my favorite professors always tweet/facebook/blog about running. And before I knew it, I saw a lot of people talking about running. So I thought, let's do this! :)

I've been running at the gym- usually 1-2.5 miles a day. I ordered some special running shoes and bought "running pants" - which are high class leggings.

One of my friends called me about two weeks ago and asked if I wanted to run in a 5k. My first gut reaction was "maybe"...I'm still training and have a lot of room to go. But the next morning I woke up and text her, "Absolutely- sign me up!"

***
I woke up tired, but excited. As I was leaving, I went to lock the house and the key broke. Literally broke in half. Part of it was stuck in the door and the other half was in my hand. If this is a sign of how my day is supposed to be, I'm screwed, I thought. But I do what I do best, and I laughed it off.

I got to my friends house and called her cell phone. No answer. Oh no, she must have over-slept- which is NOT like her at all. Doors were locked.

I waited outside for 40 minutes- calling and texting in 5 minute intervals. Still no answer. Oh well- there is no sense being mad or upset- life is 100% how you look at it- so I made a plan: be positive, forgive, and run! :)

I had no idea where the race was- I only knew it was in Monroeville. And I couldn't tell you how to get there or where to meet...sooo I made up my mind to still run - in Decatur.

The race must go on.

So I named my race.

"The Decatur 2010 Riding Solo 5K"

I started the race with the same song I planned last night- "My Humps" by Black Eyed Peas.

I ran.

I walked.

I smiled at complete strangers.

I said, "Good morning" to the old man planting flowers.

I stopped once to look at pictures in a window of the local photographer.

I was enjoying every minute of my race.

And I was in the lead the whole time.

50 minutes later- I finished the race. I didn't stop at the curb either. I literally ran all the way up to my door. Jumped off the sidewalk like a little kid waiting on for the bus. Gave my car a high-five and sat down on the side walk.

I did it. I feel great. My day might not have gone the way I thought it would, but that doesn't matter. And with the money I didn't end up spending on the race, I went out and bought my family breakfast.

Life throws you curve balls sometimes- so you have to know when to step outside the batters box to hit that grand slam!

Much love,

Ashley - The Decatur 2010 Riding Solo 5k CHAMPION

The Letter

On Sunday, John Mayer spoke to me. Well, he spoke to thousands of other people. But he said something that really stuck with me.

"Haters are going to hate, but that just means that lovers got to love...so you write the blog," and that is when I stopped listening and decided he was speaking to me.

This one is for the lovers.

****
For my wedding present, I told Justin to write me a letter. I don't need a fancy piece of jewelry- I'll probably lose it. I don't need tickets to an expensive vacation. I'm completely happy with saving for a house. I don't need an expensive dress. For our on our wedding day, I'll be wearing the most expensive and special dress of my entire life.

Instead, I just wanted a letter. Nothing more than words on paper that take my mind to places no diamond, vacation, or expensive outfit could ever take me...

He pulled me aside during our rehersal dinner. He had a huge smile on his face and said, "Do you want to go upstairs so I can give you your wedding gift?"

Of course, he is horrible at surprises and I'm horrible at keeping secrets- so he already got his SCUBA suit for a wedding present. Matched mine :)

He reached in his drawer and pulled out a letter. My heart smiled and my body heated up. My emotions were taking over my soul. My eyes started to fill up and I was so eager to read his beautiful words. And I still cry every single time I read the letter....


"Dear Ashley Marie Bedwell,

Tomorrow, you will become Ashley Marie Sieb. We will be one. Our own family.

Tomorrow, I will be your husband, and you will be my wife; 3 years and 8 months after we met in a college basement playing beer pong.

Tomorrow, we will say our vows, do our dance, eat our cake, and make our love.

Tomorrow, will be your day. My day. Our day.

But tomorrow is not just one day, tomorrow is forever.

We will be together, til death do us part. Our souls knew from the moment we met, that they had met their counterpart in life. The soul that had been searching for the past 19 years.

There is no one else I want to be with for the rest of my life. I love you. I love going to bed with you. I love waking up next to you. I love listening to you talk about writing. I love reading your writing. I love the mother you will be. I love challenging you. I love that you challenge me.

I am excited to be your husband. To tell you everything is going to be okay. To stick up for you in times of trial. To defend you from sharks in a few days. To wrap my arms around you after you've had a long day and tell you that you're beautiful. To be a good father. To love you until the day that I die.

Your gift:
I wish that I had known Grandpa Larry. He fished, he told jokes, and he gave you a hard time...sounds like I would have got along with him just fine. I know how much he meant to you and know how much you would love for him to be in the pews with Grandma Iris, but God has his plans. Your grandpa is watching us right now, smiling. Proud of the woman you have become, and the man that you have found to take care of you. He may not be in the pews, but you will have him in your bouquet tomorrow and in your heart forever."

A tear splashed down on the letter. And then a few more. I looked him and saw him holding a box with a locket in it. My locket with grandpa's picture in it.

I looked up at him. His eyes were full and for once in my life, I was speechless. Absolutely speechless.

Love is a verb. An action. You do more than feel it and say it, you act on it. So I hugged him hard and felt my heart beat through his. And that letter is the most magical present I've ever received. And ever will.

Much love,
Ashley

Ketchup On My Potatoes

The rain was pouring when I drove home from work. While the stormy days make me appreciate the sunny days, my mind definitely wonders deeper during the darker days.

When I came home, I was pleased to see Justin. He was all dressed up in his dress clothes. His dress shirt wasn't tucked in, but it looked sexy that way.

The best part was that he had dinner completely ready. It made me smile. My little Iron Chef.

"Hey babe," Justin yelled from the kitchen. "Do you like ketchup on your potatoes?"

I did. A lot actually. But I didn't always like ketchup on my potatoes. I saw my Grandpa Larry do it for years. He put ketchup on EVERYTHING! Eggs, potatoes, potato chips, and toast. I'm pretty sure he loved ketchup as much as I loved ranch dressing.

Even though I said I'd never pick him on Grandpa's habits- like sitting around in my underwear, yelling when anyone changed the channel, and drenching everything in ketchup...I did. Nearly all my friends have seen me lounge in my undies and Justin knows he better not even THINK about changing the channel during The Bachlorette or Greys Anatomy. And I put ketchup on everything.

But the crazy part about the whole situation is that I've been thinking about Grandpa Larry a lot lately. He passed away in high school. In March, just days before my mom's birthday. My mom is an insanely strong woman. I've only seen her cry hard twice in my entire life. One of those days was when we got the call about Grandpa.

My wedding present from Justin was a locket with my Grandpa Larry's picture in it. I put it in my bouquet on my wedding day. Walking down the isle with my handsome dad, I had my dream man in front of me and my amazing grandpa watching above me- and close to my heart. But what touched me the most was the way that Justin described my Grandpa in the letter he wrote me the night before our wedding. Justin never got the chance to meet Grandpa Larry, but knew so much about him. Justin soaked in all the stories I told about going fishing with Grandpa. He laughed at all the pranks Grandpa played. And Justin knew that he and Grandpa would get along great.

**Devin walking Grandma Iris down the isle.


I miss my Grandpa. But just as the sun is sure to shine after a stormy night, Justin made me smile when I walked home from work.

"Yes, I love ketchup on my potatoes," I said back.

Always in my heart, forever in spirit- I love you Grandpa.

Much love,
Ashley

72 Lives

Would you believe me if I told you that the death of one person extended the life of 72 other people?

You should.

Because Rick Girod saved, changed, or impacted 72 lives through his death. That means 144 parents had their son or daughter saved because of Rick passing away. So, Rick's death didn't just affect the people in Indiana. In our small town. In our circle of friends. In his family. He affected the lives of so many people. His decision to donate changed the life of hundreds of people. Maybe thousands.

I only know this because I ran into his mother and father last night. As I was walking over to see the Girods, I kept thinking about how this time of year was probably so hard for them. It was five years this past Fourth of July.

His mother is a beautiful, strong woman and greeted me with a huge smile. She instantly asking me questions and congratulating me on my recent marriage.

She went on to tell me that Abbey had shared with her the link to my blog that I recently wrote about Rick passing away. We shared ideas about starting a blog or forum for family and friend's to write stories and memories about Rick.

First memory.

Best memory.

Favorite trip.

Biggest lesson.

Last memory.....

We want to hear it all....from everyone. I'm so excited and honored to help establish this Web site/blog for her and his family/friends.

Stories truly bring people together. And that is one of the biggest reasons I love writing....it's so powerful.

*********

Rick is a angel still among us. He is a true hero. Rick told his mother that he wanted to be an organ donor just two weeks before he died. After Corey passed away, he knew donating was something he wanted to do. No one knew that it would happen so soon....

He has touched so many lives and I am honored to have known Rick. I'm so thankful that I can see his family and friends to celebrate his life and all that he accomplished in his short years on this earth.

I hope you will all participate and share stories when we get the Web site up and running. Stay posted.

This is one's for Rick's family and loved ones.....


Much love,
Ashley

A Day to Remember

The Fourth of July means a lot of things to me. It's a day of celebration for our country. Our Independence Day. It also happens to be my best friend's birthday, Gina Grant. So I celebrate her life in mine. Twins.

But more so, every single year, I am reminded of the day a great friend passed away in a horrible car accident. Rick Girod was so young when he died. He was speeding on his way too church, the car lost control and he passed away in the hospital days later.

I got the text when I was at work. I read the words. "Rick died." My phone dropped and then my body followed. I fell to the ground and I couldn't process the entire situation. We just lost Corey.....I didn't watch a single firework that day. I didn't do anything except for lay on the couch and cry.

Is this really happening?

Is he really gone?

How is Abbey (his beautiful girlfriend) doing!?

And how can this happen so quickly, we just lost our great friend Corey Shaffer nearly a month before....

It was hard the next year. Insanely hard. I didn't want to celebrate with everyone because I was holding onto the memory that surrounded the day. A memory that I didn't want to be real. Couldn't it just be a mistake? It wasn't...It never will be.

So, it's that time of year again. When a million emotions come flying at me like a mass of angry insects onto a fast moving car.

But this time, I'm going to celebrate his life. Remember the happy times we spent together. In fact, the funniest part about my friendship with Rick is that he truly was my elementary school crush. I thought for sure we'd get married. So handsome and loved the Dallas Cowboys, come on, what else could you ask for!?!

But then one day Dad came home and told me we were meeting this new girl he was dating and her kids. I was excited. He said the boy was my age and the girls were a little older.....

You guessed it. I walked in and saw Rick! WHAT!?! Dad you can't date the mother of the my love. It's funny now looking back at the situation. So I've decided to smile and remember those moments.

And when I look up at the sky and see those fireworks, I'll think of Rick smiling down on us. And Corey. He will be dancing above with Rick. After all, Corey was the Pool Party Dance Champ nearly every single year. They'll be looking down at us while we look up at the sky. Just like they have been for the last five years.

Watching us grow older. Graduating from college. Getting married. Having children. They have been watching over all of their friends and that is worth smiling back at them in sky.

"But patiently, you slipped away from me, Oh God I want you back, Oh God I miss my friend, But so patiently..." O.A.R.

For you Rick and Corey, I say this with teary eyes- Much love,
Ashley

Reality+Dreams

I like my plate full, and not just at the dinner table. I enjoy a fast-paced life and have a hard time actually relaxing- my body can rest, but not my mind. This past year I juggled school, work, wedding planning, driving from Muncie to Indy daily, and trying to have some sort of a social life. And I enjoyed it for the most part.

And now reality has finally sank in. I am graduated and on the job hunt-- and I'm really holding for a particular position that I'd absolutely thrive in and enjoy the people too. =) But now, I am only working part-time. I can't even explain how I feel. I'm searching for things to do, yet not sure where to turn. Laying out by the pool seems pretty awesome until you realize all your other friends/family/husband are at work, so you are left alone.

I thought I'd look forward to a slower schedule. A little more time to breathe. But really, I miss writing my t0-do list. I miss highlighting sections of my planner in different colors based on importance.

I remember Justin hit this peak of reality too. It was in August and I just started back up at school. And work. And Ball Bearings. And driving all over the state of Indiana for work/school/meetings/weddings/life, etc. But his job didn't start until early September. So he felt lost and didn't know how to spend his time...it really is hard adjustment.

So here is my game plan. I'm training for a half marathon starting tomorrow. I'll write down my workouts in my planner and highlight them based on intensity and location. I'll start keeping a food journal too. If I write it down, I have to admit to eating it. Therefore, I'll really have to think twice about eating Taco Bell or having that jumbo Margarita across the street. But doing this has been a real goal/dream for me! And I'm excited! I'll post a picture tomorrow of my pre and post workout...I'm sure that will be a treat!

Much love,
Ashley

Wedding Season

I'm a sucker for weddings. I always have been, even as a young girl. I can't say that I pictured myself getting married -- because for the longest time I wasn't sure it was for me (Thankfully, that changed after meeting Justin).

But I love everything about weddings. But the biggest thing I love about weddings is that no wedding is EXACTLY the same.

White dress and ivory dresses.

Dark colors to pale colors to many colors.

Destination weddings to backyard weddings.

Small weddings to packed-to-the walls weddings.

10 year love stories to 2 month love stories (although, I've seriously heard of shorter than that!).

You get surprised every wedding you attend. Either the bride and groom surprise you, like Justin and I did with our first dance. Or parents, pastors, or guests mix up the service/reception/celebration.

I'm really excited that wedding season is here. I've been so blessed to meet many wonderful people and share in their experiences as they come together and get married.

But the biggest thing I've learned through all of the ceremonies and receptions is this: getting married is more than a celebration. Saying "I Will" doesn't just occur the day of your wedding. A marriage is something that takes work. Often fun and thrilling, but marriage can also be terrifying and aggravating.

Being in love is what starts all the explosion and passion, but truly loving someone is what keeps your souls together. Your hearts beating to the same tune. And your minds united.

Cheers to wedding season and congrats to everyone getting married this summer. It's also good to remember those adorable married couples on the dance floor- still dancing and celebrating years after their own special day. I like to keep my eye on those crazy cats. =)

Much love,
Ashley