Baby Shots (aka The Worst Day)

As I approached Cooper's two month doctor appointment, my mom friends warned me that this would be a very hard day.

Baby shots day.

The worst day.

I didn't really know how to prepare for the day. A lot of woman said they cried. Many suggested turning your head. And a handful made their husbands come with them.

So obviously I made Justin come! He worked from home that afternoon. Once he got home, he quickly picked up Coop for a quick snuggle session.

Coop and Daddy snuggling. I die.

After snuggling for a bit, we headed to the doctor's appointment. Coop ate about an hour earlier, so I thought he would be OK with a half-empty belly. I wasn't sure if he should come on a full belly or not...so we went half-empty!

Once we got to the doctor's office, Coop was being his little, happy self!

HEY MOM!

Smiling and kicking!
He had no clue what his future had in store...

Once we got into the room, the nurse took Coop's measurements.

He is 24 inches long (putting him in the 89th percentile).

For some reason I can't recall what his head size is, but I'm thinking it was above average. Little man has a pretty large head.

Then we had to strip Cooper down to a clean diaper to get his weight.

That face.
You guys, I live for this little face.

Coop gained 2 lbs from his one month check up! He now weighs 12 lbs and 5 ozs.

He is a big, healthy, and happy baby boy!! What else could we ask for?!

Isn't he so adorable?

We chatted with the doctor about the recent changes in the last month. We didn't have any major concerns- just mentioned that he snores + seemed to have SOME cradle cap. She told us to start using the aspirator before bed to clear his nose and try to brush the dry skin out from his scalp.

Next came the second worst part of the doctor appointment.

"I'm a little concerned about the shape of his head," she said. "His head is starting to look a little flat."

I came clean that Cooper hates tummy time. He usually just lays there or screams until I roll him over.

She turned him on his belly and like I predicted, he started having a meltdown.

"Oh yes- you're right," she said. "He really doesn't like tummy time. But you have to keep working with him on tummy time. Make it more of a habit. Start doing tummy time at least 4 times a day for 10 minutes or more. He really needs to strengthen his neck. I'd like for him to come back next month to see how he is improving or we might have to put him in the helmet to re-shape his head."

That's when it happened.

The mom guilt.

The "OMG- I AM FAILING MY BABY" emotions started filling my body.

You should have tried harder with tummy time.

You should have rotated his head more while he was sleeping.

You should have ....

But before I could keep beating myself up, the doctor assured me that I'm doing a fine job and everything else looks great.

So we put Cooper's onsie back on and couldn't resist lighting the mood by making him look like a baby T-rex.

You're not funny, mom.

Justin and I also got the T-dap shot yesterday - so it was a family affair of shots at the doctor's office.

While the nurse was getting the shots ready, Coop started fussing like he was hungry.

"Well maybe if we feed him he will calm down and feel more content before the shots," I suggested.

So we got out his bottle and fed up about 1.5 ozs before the nurse came in.

(THIS WAS A BIG MISTAKE).

Hey at least you can learn more my mistakes...

The nurse gave me my shot first while Justin held Cooper.

Then Justin got his shot.

And then...it was my sweet baby Coop's turn.

He was just laying on the table so peaceful.

So calm.

He looked at me and gave me a half-smile.

I died on the inside. Oh, I simply felt so bad for him...he literally had NO clue what was about to happen. And years and years from now I KNOW he will never remember this moment.

But I will.

I'll always remember his sweet little face.

The calm before the storm.

The innocence in his eyes.

"I promise it hurts the parents worse than the baby," the nurse said. "And this is my least favorite part of the job too."

She gave him the liquid first (which I am awful and totally forget what it was...I just know Coop took it like a champ and didn't complain or take forever to down it).  

She had us hold down his hands while she held down his legs and lined up the shots.

I could see his face start to turn into more of a panic.

Why is everyone holding me down? 

What's happening?

Mom...mom...help! What's going on?

That's what Coop was thinking. I just know it.

"Okay," the nurse said. "Here we go!"

Once the first shot went into his leg, he screamed louder than I've ever heard him cry.

Real tears were pouring out of his eyes.

And his entire little body was bright red.

I wanted to pick him up right then and there - I tried to soothe him and tell him everything would be OK.

Children - even babies- can sense your emotions. They can tell when you are tense or upset or sad...I firmly believe that your emotions feed their emotions. (That's why I always try to smile and laugh with Coop - I think it makes him a happier baby)!

Anyway, I stayed strong. I didn't cry (even though I was bawling on the inside) and just kept focusing on remaining calm for him.

Once all the shots were done, I picked him up and wrapped him in my arms. He was still screaming and bright red. I thought he was having an allergic reaction.

"Babe, is this normal?" I asked, as if he was a pediatrician himself. "Do you think he is OK!?"

"Yes babe," Justin said. "He is fine."

And Justin started rubbing his forehead and kissing him too.

A minute or so later, he stopped crying and just looked really sad.

My poor baby.

Please don't hate me, Coop!

I got a shot too!!

The doctor said some babies get fussy after shots. Sometimes they get a low-grade fever, but most babies are just really sleepy.

"Don't be surprised if he just wakes up to eat and then sleeps again," she told us.

Once he calmed down, we put on his pants and headed to the check-out.

Remember when I told you feeding him before the shot was a BAD idea? Well that's because he PUKED all over himself in his car seat when we were walking out. He barely complained - it just came out all over the place.

Poor guy screamed and cried so hard that everything just came back out.

We snuggled with him in the lobby until he started to fall asleep and we drove home.

And once we got home, all I wanted to do was snuggle with him and put him close to my heart. 

My little love.

I kept beating myself up about not being so diehard about tummy time. And Justin could tell I was super upset.

"I just hate thinking I've failed him," I said.

"Ashley - you haven't failed him," Justin said, "Just try harder and become religious about tummy time. Even if he cries, just keep him down there. You can do this...and so can he! Just move forward and don't worry about the past."

I barely smiled, but I agreed that he was right.

"But the fact that are so beaten up about this is proof how good of a mom you are," Justin said. "You care so much."

I'm thankful he was there to remind me that I'm doing a great job and the only thing we can do is move forward! And that's exactly what we did.

And we discussed how lucky we are to have a healthy baby! He doesn't have any major health issues and he is growing and happy. Some parents have to see their child battle cancer or heart problems or seizures or a thousands of other health issues...We are lucky. And if the biggest problem we have is cradle cap and Cooper wears a helmet for a few months...well then, I'd say we are STILL very lucky. And we will still look super cute - helmet or no helmet. The glass if always half full.

Today was a good day!

We did more tummy time throughout the day - Coop complained (of course), but we fought through! I also added a pillow to his favorite old man chair:

"What do you mean my head is a little flat?!"

But Coop is back to his regular self! Happy, smiley, and making hilarious faces / poses.

PEACE MAN!
Also, please don't be a thumb sucker Coop. Stop eating your hand!

So moms out there reading this blog, let this be a reminder to relax.

Don't beat yourself up. 

If you're upset, that means you CARE! And a caring mom is the best kind of mom. 

No matter what battle you're fighting - parenthood is full of battles - just remember to find the support you need (whether that support be emotionally, physically, financially, or all three forms) to climb the mountain and come out on top with your babes right by your side or in your arms. You're doing great.

You ARE great.

Much love,
Ashley

One Month Check-Up: The Stats

Today we had Coop's one month check-up. I had no idea what to expect, but I knew I wanted him to look stylish.  I dressed him up in his adorable fleece outfit. 

I adore him.

And we obviously had to take a mirror selfie. 

We kind of matched, right?

"Yo mom, what's with all of these layers?!"

Smirking in his chair (aka taking a poop- hey at least he did it BEFORE the appointment).

Once he was done "taking care of business" - we left for the doctor. Usually he falls asleep during the car ride, but he was WIDE awake when we got to the doctor's office. 

He was cracking me up with his facial expressions (per usual) and I was talking to him like a normal person. I also started singing along to the music playing in the office + making him dance in his car seat.

 

People watching.

The nurse came into the room and recognized us from our earlier visits.

"Nice to see you again, Cooper!" she said. "Look how much you've grown!"

She took his head measurements and temperature. Cooper was EXTREMELY dramatic about the entire process- he definitely gets that from me. He started screaming the moment she took his temperature under his armpit. Obviously the temperature taking didn't hurt him ONE bit, but I think he didn't like the idea of having someone hold down his arm. He likes to wiggle and move around at his own will. How dare someone hold down his arm.

Once she finished taking his temperature, Coop stopped crying instantly. He just looked at her as if he was saying, "Alright lady - I think you're done now."

Both of us were cracking up!

"Oh Cooper, you're making me laugh today," she said.

Then it was time to weigh him! 

I stripped Cooper down to a fresh diaper - can't let an extra pee or poo add to the scales!

Poor baby had gas today - look at that belly!

Last time, Cooper was 8 lbs and 5 ozs.

He was born 7 lbs even and dropped to 6 lbs and 3 ozs when we wasn't eating well / had jaundice issues.

So I was guessing he'd weigh about 9 lbs nad 6 ozs. But lil Coop exceeded my expectations!

The Stats:

Weight: 10 lbs and 5 ozs / 57 percentile (looks like our feeding plan is working out JUST fine!)

Height: 23 and 3/4 inches / 99 percentile (looks like we have a future basketball player on our hands)

Head: 37 1/4 cm / 44 percentile (looks like that cone head is going down after all)

One hour vs. one month.

Little man, I'm so happy that you're growing into a happy and healthy little babes. Maybe next month you'll start sleeping through the night. Yes? Maybe? At least two nights a week? DEAL!

Much love,
Ashley

The Final (Cooper) Countdown

"When are you due!?" a woman asked me in the restroom yesterday.

"Next Sunday!" I said back. 

Holy cow - I am due to have a baby next flipping weekend!!! 

I almost crapped my pants as I spoke those words...guess I was in the right place for that to happen...

Can you believe I am almost 39 weeks!?!!?

I had a doc appt today. I was a little anxious because I knew they would check to see if I was dilated or not. And I was warned last week that this can be a painful exam (depending on your definition of "pain"). 

Justin actually joined me for the doc appt today - it was so nice to have him there with me. 

First, I gave the traditional urine sample. And yes, I always draw a smile face on the cup!

Happy pee.

Next, I went to the dreaded scale. I gained 1 lb from last week. I finally caved and bought a scale for the home again. I am usually 3-4 lbs lighter in the morning - so I wasn't surprised when I saw the number on the scale (my appt was at 2 pm). 

To date, I've gained 40 lbs during my pregnancy. 38 lbs on a good day! I wanted to only gain about 25-30 lbs, but hey - I'll take it! I'm still proud of myself for being so active throughout this pregnancy. And for the MOST part, I ate pretty healthy!

Next, the nurse took my blood pressure. I had a feeling (based on the heat and my swelling) that it would be higher than normal - and it was. My BP was 140/90. Higher than normal, but nothing to panic about.

The nurse gave me a robe and told me the doctor would be in shortly. Justin helped me put the robe on, which I found adorable! 

"Look at your little butt!" Justin said. 

"There is nothing little about my butt," I said back. "There might be a little BIT sticking out, but that thing is definitely not little..." 

We both laughed - I don't mean that in a negative way. I enjoy my booty and curves. And so does J! 

Does anyone else think I look like a meerkat in this picture?

Also, this is what a pregnant meerkat looks like for comparison:

You're welcome.

The doctor came in and found Cooper's heartbeat - 132 bmp! 

Perfect. 

I wanted to run out of the room - with my butt cheeks flopping in the wind and all - and break into the ultrasound room to see pictures of him! We haven't had an ultrasound since week 20 when he looked like this:

I am so eager to see what he looks like now.... And most importantly, I just want go know if he is healthy. 

Next came the big ol' exam! I definitely thought it would be way worse...I had a little discomfort, but nothing that made me want to cry or moan in pain. 

"Oh wow," she said. "That's good."

Hmm what's good!? Did you just high give my baby down here!? 

"You are 1 CM dilated," she said. "And your cervix is already 80% thinned out." 

"Sooo that's a good thing!?" I asked, slightly confused about what this cervix talk means. 

"Oh yeah!" She said. "You could have a baby tomorrow...or it could still be a few weeks." 

Justin and I just looked at each other and smiled. 

"But your cervix looks great," she said. "This was the best cervical exam I've done all day!" 

I felt like I should have received a certificate. Or at least a high five! 

But instead, I settled for a moment of uncomfortable silence and then I probably said something awkward. I honestly can't remember because I was too busy daydreaming about the moment I get to see Cooper for the first time! 

"And I am on call this weekend," she said. "So who knows- I might just see you this weekend!"   

Oh. My. Gosh. 

Cooper is making his way down and the pathway is opening up. Sure - it could be a few weeks. I've heard people say they (or someone they know) as 3-4 CM for weeks. 

But all I know is - no matter what - I will be giving birth to a beautiful baby boy in less than two weeks! 

Now if you will excuse me, I am off to walk bandit, do some free weights, and bounce on my ab ball... Gotta work this baby out of me somehow! 

Much love, 

Ashley 

Operation Set Cooper Free

Photo Credit = My Uncle Kris

Cooper is due on September 8th.

The opening day of Football season.

And my best friend Kaila's birthday. 

Will he come early?

Will he come on time?

Will he go over my due date?

These questions run through my mind on a daily basis. But after today's doctor appointment, I am feeling confident that he will stay in as long as possible. He is perfectly happy break dancing in my womb and kicking my rib cage when he gets hungry.

Before my appointment today, I went to the store and picked up a cookie cake. I wrote a short "thank you" note - simply thanking the staff, nurses, and doctors for being so amazing and making me feel so comfortable from Day 1.

People never forget when you bring them treats and kind notes.
Trust me on this one.

I was under the impression that this doctor appointment would include the infamous Group B streptococcus (GBS) culture.

What type of test is that, Ashley?

Well my friend, I'm glad you asked.

The doctor simply swobs your rectal and vaginal area.

You're welcome. 

While GBS is harmless in most healthy adults, it can be passed to your newborn during delivery and cause a life threatening infection. So while I don't dream of getting my V and B swobbed - it's really important so that proper preparations, testing, and treatment are considered before Baby Cooper arrives (should I carry GBS).

Here are some key stats from my doctor appointment: 

Weight: I've officially gained 40 lbs. I told myself I wouldn't look at the scale (like I always say), but I did (like I always do). I am trying not to stress or worry about this number. The doctors haven't mentioned my weight being an issue (even though I know deep down it is). I'm not at a healthy weight. And I'll definitely have my work cut out once I adjust to mommyhood.

Blood Pressure:  120 / 80 (nailed it!!!!!)

After the nurse was done, the doctor came into the room and asked how I am feeling.

"I'm feeling wonderful," I said. "I'm a little tried, especially today..."

Today was awful. I hate to complain, but it was really NOT a good day...

"Well you look wonderful," she said. "You hide it well!"

"I am having a little bit of pressure down there...nothing major though," I said. 

She said that was normal, especially with the baby making his way down.

Next, she measured my belly and told me that everything is measuring perfectly.

Then she measured Cooper's heartbeat, which is music to my ears. A reminder that no matter how bad of a day I'm having, my baby boy is alive. He is doing well. He is growing and moving and being awesome on a daily basis.

140 bpm.

"Nice, healthy, and strong heartbeat," she said.

"That is what I love to hear," I said.

"Well - you're doing great with everything," she said. "Next time, we will do the strep test and see how you're moving along."

Ummm hold the phone?! I thought. No strep test. I've come prepared! Now I have to wait another two weeks!!

I said nothing and simply smiled.

"Do you have any other questions?" she asked me.

"I think I'm good!" I said back, still debating if I should just ask to get the test done today.

My next appointment is in two weeks...I'll be almost 38 weeks pregnant!! They sure don't seem too concerned about Cooper coming early. 

What's my gut feeling? I think I'll go over my due date by a few days. But I also thought I was having a girl...so who knows how legit my predictions are these days.

 So, what's your bet? When will Cooper be set free? 

Much love,
Ashley

April 17- Save the Date!

Well, the number on the scale isn't terrible. I didn't get a definite view (because I'm so tall and the digital scale is too low).

I'm in the 240s...my first appointment I was 238.

So first trimester weigh in is less than 10 lbs gained! I'll take it!!! My doctor and I are hoping that I gain between 25-30 lbs.

Anyway, enough about weight. I'm not stressing about that darn scale. I'm growing a baby and that's amazing.

The doctor walked in and she busted me eating a banana.

"Hey, it could be a lot worse," she said. "Now, if it was a candy bar...I might be giving you a different lecture. But a banana- that's just fine!"

I'm jumping ahead here...BUT I wanted mac and cheese so desperately bad after my appointment.... and guess what? I passed it up for a fresh salad. Bam.

Anyway, Baby Sieb kept wiggling and moving and dancing while she was trying to find the heart beat....

She kept smiling while she was searching. They probably teach doctors that in Med School....

It's the same concept as parenting...if you act scared, your child will act scared and become afraid too!

Soooo one of us had to stay positive.

"Baby is playing tricks on us today," she said.

"Oh, did you hear that?!" she asked. "That was Baby moving!"

After Baby Sieb had a solo dance party in the womb that seemed to last four hours (okay maybe 2 minutes), we finally found the heart beat!

138 beats per minute!

Perfectly normal.

And she said my belly was growing and measuring with what it should too!

Finally, she scheduled my ultrasound (the big gender reveal ultrasound) for April 17th! That's a Wednesday. In case you want even MORE details, my appointment is at 10 am.

Someone (and by someone - I mean Justin) needs to hide my phone so I don't instantly share online with you guys the gender of our baby!

I want to surprise you guys some how.....

Hmmm, I am sure I'll come up with something creative :)

PS Don't forget to take the gender poll on my blog! So far, the majority of you think Baby Sieb is a girl!

What do we want to have?

A healthy, happy baby!

That's our only request. 

Much love,
Ashley