Busting Out of My Comfort Creature Shell: The Year of New

I’m declaring 2013 the Year of New. Previously, I’ve spent the last day of the year thinking of aspects of my life (mainly body) I’d like to change. 

Run 2011 miles.

Lose 30 lbs.

Run a full marathon.

I never fully achieved the above goals...

I ran about 800 miles in one year.

I lost 40 lbs, but gained nearly all my weight back after a few stressful months.

And I dropped down to a half marathon after I quickly realized my body wasn’t ready for a full marathon.

But this year, I plan on doing something different. And by doing new activities and eating new foods, maybe I'll end up losing that weight and keeping it off. Because I'll be happier, healthier, and less stressed.

Overall, I want to become a better-rounded person. It’s very easy to get caught up on aspects of your life that are familiar. For example, do any of these sentences ring a bell?

• You order the same sandwich for lunch at the same restaurant each week.
• You watch the same movies over and over again.
• You read books from only the same author.
• You bring the same wine (Sangria or Moscato) or make the same an appetizer to every function (Buffalo Chicken Dip).

All of those sound like me…You see, I’m becoming a bit of a comfort creature. 

This is a real comfort creature.
Google told me so.

But in 2013- I want to eat new meals, watch new movies, read new books, and explore recipes beyond buffalo chicken dip.

I want to experience newness each month.

Each day.

I’m still creating my “list of new” but here is what I’ve developed so far:

• Cook dinner one night per week (a new habit for me).
• Learn new workout programs such as yoga, cycling, and swimming.
• Try a different wine and beer each month.
• Eat dinner somewhere new once a month.
• Watch at least one film from another country.
• Read four books about another culture or country.
• Order one new piece of jewelry from another country.
• Try a different coffee drink each month.
• Listen to a new music artist each week.
• Buy one piece of new artwork for our house this year.
• Shoot a new gun. You’re welcome, Justin.
• Buy a new pair of boots each month. Just kidding, Justin…or am I? Muh ahahahaha (Dr. Evil laugh).
• Travel to four new cities. And do something fun at each new destination!
• Run 5-6 new (organized) races this year. 
• Donate to a new charity each month (part of my Year of Random Acts of Kindness).

I’d love to get your ideas for something new for me in 2013! Share your ideas below, comment on Facebook, or tweet me back with inspiration for the Year of New!

I’m so excited to see what 2013 brings for you and I.

Maybe you’ll join me? 

This is what I look like right now.
Extreme bedhead.

So I better skedaddle and get moving...

Because I desperately need a shower.

And a new hair do.

Much love,
Ashley

Tears of Joy

I cried while driving into work this morning.

Not the uncontrollable, ugly cry.

Even beautiful people have "ugly cry" faces.

I just had a few tears fall down my face.

Tears of joy, as I call them.

I pictured myself at the start line tomorrow morning.

Listening to the song, "Hats Off to Larry" - the song my Grandpa requested we play at his funeral. The song was a suggestion by my mom, and I knew instantly I wanted to start the race to his song.

Tomorrow, I'll walk up to the start line more prepared than EVER before.

Sure I missed a few long runs.

And I missed even more short runs during the week.

But I feel confident.

I feel strong.

I've done a great good job training this time around. 

Previous races, I was lucky to get one or two 6 milers under my belt.

MAYBE I would do a 10 miler.

These past few weeks have been UBBER emotional. I can't explain right now, but I will one day soon. Hang tight...

But thankfully, I'll be surrounded with friends, fellow runners. volunteers, and spectators that inspire me.

Tomorrow when I walk up to the start line, I'm not letting my stresses, worries, emotions, or fears win.

I started out this journey dreaming of a full marathon, but I knew I wasn't ready to climb that mountain. Not yet. I've had my doubts along the way...like most runners do. But I am bringing my strength, confidence, and courage with me to the start line. And thanks to advice from Meggie Dials, I'm going to master my race photos tomorrow too!

"It is a rough road that leads to the heights of greatness."
--Seneca

And one more quote...just because it made me smile and you guys KNOW I love quotes.

"Some people don't have the guts for distance racing. The polite term for them is sprinters." 

Much love,
Ashley

Don't Be Afraid to Fail

My friend Megan emailed me last night. My heart filled with happiness knowing that she took the time to think of me...and wanted to make me feel better. In fact, the response from everyone yesterday was so amazing and overwhelming....

I can't even tell you how many times I've read each of these comments.
I'm so blessed to call each and every one of you a friend.
xoxo.

Here is what Megan said in her email:

Hi Ashley,

This is what is on our fridge and I need to read it all the time...

Don't Be Afraid to Fail

You’ve failed many times, although you may not remember.

You fell down the first time you tried to walk.

You almost drowned the first time you tried to swim, didn’t you?

Did you hit the ball the first time you swung a bat?

Heavy hitters, the ones who hit the most home runs, also strike out a lot.

R.H. Macy failed seven times before his store in New York caught on.

English novelist John Creasey got 753 rejection slips before he published 564 books.

Babe Ruth struck out 1,330 times, but he also hit 714 home runs.

Don’t worry about failure.

Worry about the chances you miss when you don’t even try.

I cried - because that's what I do best with people inspire and motivate me. And then I thanked her for the kind email, which came at the most perfect timing.

Worrying about failure is a huge fault of mine. Even though it took years to see it and even more years to admit it, I'm a perfectionist.  I like need everything not just accurate and correct on the first try- but PERFECT on the first try.

But life isn't always perfect....

I am not always perfect...

And failing is simply part of life.

Because failure teaches you lessons. 

Failure helps you appreciate the journey, not just the destination.

Failing at something makes you stronger and wiser.

And as I think about my blog post yesterday, running a half marathon instead of a full marathon is not a failure. Not even close. But next time when I start to train for a full marathon, I won't be afraid of failing. And most importantly:

I won't let failure win.  

And this message doesn't just apply to running my half marathon in November. It applies to everything. And probably something you're experiencing right now too...Work, school, health, marriage, friendships, financials, goals, dreams - whatever you're going through...just think of this blog post. 

Don't worry about failure.  

Don't worry about anything.

Just believe in yourself, focus on the journey, and give it everything you have to come out on top!

Much love,
Ashley

Stop Doubting Yourself

“I’m sorry!!” I yelled.

I was in the middle of doing 20 jumping pull-ups.

My arms were weakening.

My heart was pounding.

And sweat was dripping down my body…down my face to my back to my feet….

I was pushing my body harder than ever before…I am talking Biggest Loser style.

Oh yeah, you know...the ugly faces, the tears, the nearly puking expressions, the grunts, etc.

Photo credit to Google Image Search.
This is what I looked like yesterday, probably at least 4 times.

“Why are you sorry!?” Dustin, my personal trainer asked me.

I suddenly felt like I was on an episode of Extreme Weight Loss Edition.

My body kept moving, but mind stopped to think.

Why am I sorry?

I wanted to say:

“I’m sorry I’m not strong enough.”
 
“I’m sorry I’m slow.”
 
“I’m sorry I’ve almost puked 3 times now.”
 
“I’m sorry if my form is off.”

Instead of replying with any of these responses, I said, “I’m sorry that I always say I’m sorry. I just don’t believe in myself…it's something I know I need to work on...”

“Listen, you’re doing great,” Dustin said. “I’ll tell you when your form is off or if you should be working harder. Stop doubting yourself.”

I wanted to cry.

Not because I was sad...

But because he believed in me more than I believed in myself.

(Disclaimer: I did not cry, which was a huge milestone of my week).

***
Let's back track for a hot minute...

Two years ago, my best friend’s husband (Dustin) became a personal trainer at a fitness club called Fitness 180.

The very first night I met Dustin! Winter 2006.

The club was only a few miles from my office, and at the time – it was only a five minute drive from our apartment.

“You should come see me!” Dustin would always say. “I won’t work you too hard. Oh wait, yes I will.”

I always promised I would come in and see him, but I never did.

Deep down I was afraid.

Afraid I would get my butt kicked.

Afraid I would look like a fool.

Afraid I would fail.

But in reality, I would get my butt kicked. That’s what personal trainers are there for…

I would look like a fool, because everyone has to start somewhere.

And I was only failing myself by not even trying.

I had absolutely nothing to lose, except for more weight- which hello I’m obviously all about losing more lbs!!

***
Okay...back to the last night...

When I arrived to Dustin’s gym, I was nervous.

Extremely nervous, but as you know –nervousness comes with my personality.

He asked me how “hard” I wanted to go tonight, on a scale of 1 to 10.

I said a 7.

“Alright, let’s start with 30 push-ups,” Dustin said.

“Can I do them girly style?” I asked.

“No,” Dustin said. “Well, at least try the regular ones and we can worry about altering your form if you can’t do regular push-ups.”

Strike one, I thought. First exercise and I was already struggling.

“If you have to do 10, then take a break- that’s fine,” Dustin assured me.

After watching my form he said, “Look out at this paper, don’t look directly down. It’s harder on your neck that way.”

I crashed after 10.

“Alright,” Dustin said. “Not bad.”

I thought we were moving on. I did 10, right? That was good enough, right?

“Wait, don’t stand up,” Dustin said. “You aren’t done. You have 20 more to go.”

Dustin was the voice of reason I’ve always needed inside my head.

He was the external voice telling me I can’t stop early.

I must dig deep every single rep is completed.

I finished the push-ups. My form didn’t look pretty, but I finished all 30...

“Okay, when was the last time you jumped rope?” Dustin asked me next, wasting no time going to the next exercise.

“Ummm when I was 12?” I said.

“Okay, well do as many as you can to start,” Dustin said.

I did 5.

“Okay, try again. But this time go for 20,” Dustin said and then offered a suggestion to my form.

I did 7.

“Alright,” Dustin started. “Do 20 or you have to do burpees next.”

Oh hell no. Not burpees, I thought to myself.

I did 23.

“Great job,” Dustin said. “The good news is you don’t have to burpees next. The bad news is I am making you do them later.”

“NOOOO!” I said.

He laughed, “Oh yes! Kaila told me not go on hard you, but you said you wanted to go for a 7.”

“That was before I knew what 7 meant!!” I said back, already exhausted after only two routines.

Our workout continued, I almost puked like 3 times.

But I never puked (even though we made a special trip to the bathroom to splash water on my face and wrists).

Instead, I fought through some of the hardest exercises that I’ve ever done (see introduction above). 

And one time (at band camp), I made the mistake of telling Dustin, “I can’t do that…”

“We have a rule here at Fitness 180,” Dustin said. “You are not allowed to say you can’t do anything. Instead, you can say, ‘I am going to try my hardest.’”

He was so motivating the entire night. He knew when to ask me questions about life, work or my weekend plans if I needed to escape the “pain” of the workout.

He would count down in a motivating way.

“Just three more left,” Dustin would say. “Give it everything you have. One, Two, Three!”

I lived for those final countdowns last night.

He would tell me to keep going strong when I wanted to give up. I don’t know if he is a mind reader or if I am just terrible at hiding my emotions (I’ll go with the ladder)…but he really inspired me when I needed it the most.

He was my very own Chris Powell.

Our last exercise of the night was the kettlebell swing.

I didn’t feel like I had much strength left in my body.

When Dustin handed me the kettlebell I said, “This feels really heavy.”

“Just try it,” Dustin said. “If we need to lower it after a few reps, we will.”

You are seeing a trend here…I am constantly doubting myself before I even start anything.

Sure enough, I killed it and finished strong.

“I knew you could do it,” Dustin said. “You did great today. Like I said earlier, just stop doubting yourself…"

I discovered this a muscle in my back / shoulder area that I didn’t even know existed. I could barely lift my arms to wash my hair this morning. Despite a few body aches, I have a feeling this is just the beginning of an amazing journey.

And I am already looking forward to next week’s workout.

He looks scary.

But I promise, he's only scary when he needs to be! :)

So, what is your life lesson for the day?

Believe in yourself. Take a chance to try something new and challenge yourself.

I guarantee you are stronger than you think...

Much love,
Ashley

Gotta Get Down on Friday

How far down?

31.5 lbs down.

Happy Friday.

Much love,

Ashley

Running Alone

On Saturday, I'll wake up at 5:45 am.

I'll drive to downtown Indy alone.

I am guessing I'll blast Nicki Minaj to wake me up and get motivated. 

I'll need the motivation more than ever before....Why?

Because I won't have a running partner.

I won't have anyone pushing me through the final mile.

I won't have anyone waiting for me at the finish line.

When I'm hurting, I'll have to push myself to finish. And when I'm running too fast, I'll need to slow myself down. I need to have a consistent pace to meet my goal.

Saturday morning will be a challenge.

I have a lot to prove to myself.

To be honest, I'm feeling really good about this race.

I went for a quick run tonight - the first "real" run since my injury.

Rocking my hipster glasses.
Straight out of the 1970s from Grandma Kaye.

I told myself to run the fastest mile I could - and then I would finish home with intervals. I knew by going faster early, I would prove that I still my running mojo.

And I had an amazing pace - the best I've had in a LONG time!!

Yes, a bird crapped on me while I was running today.
#RunnersProblems

The first mile was VERY strong - about a 10:20 pace. I slowed down (obviously) during the second mile because I was doing walking and running intervals. I didn't want to over-do anything with my injury.

My goal is to finish the 5K in under 38 minutes. That would be maintaining a 12 minute mile or less, which I believe is definitely possible!

For the half marathon on May 19, I'd like my pace to be under 13 minute miles, which would put me finishing in about 2:45- a PR by about 10 minutes!!

I can do hit my goals.

I will hit my goals.

I'll be reading tweets, Facebook posts, texts and emails all morning - so maybe I won't be alone. I'll have you all to inspire, encourage and motivate me. Thank you for your love and support! I'll really need it this weekend!

Much love,
Ashley

Running for Pro and Paul

I am certain of many things in life.

God.

True love.

Second chances.

Good people.

The belief that everything happens for a reason.

And I'm certain that I have the horrible luck.

Last night, I was BEYOND excited that Justin's parents got me a "Run Happy" cape for the 5k.

Brooks Running re-tweeted this picture of me and posted it on their Pinterest board.
#KindOfABigDeal

The excitement quickly turned me into a five-year-old child.

"Rodger- take a picture of me jumping in the air!!" I yelled.

Of course the picture didn't even turn out well...

I landed on the ground hard - and my foot couldn't handle the impact, so it quickly gave out.

I feel backward.

My foot instantly started tingling.

"Are you OK?" Rodger asked me while laughing.

I lied, "Yeah, I think I'm OK."

I tried to get up and it hurt SO bad to put any weight on my foot. Of course, the day before a race, and I jack up my foot.

Friday night = reading Runner's World, icing my right foot and playing Draw Something.

"Are you sure you're okay?" Rodger asked me again.

It was time to admit it.

"No, I'm not doing too well...it really hurts," I said.

When I woke up this morning, my foot felt worse.

I limped to the bathroom.

"Nothing is stopping me today," I thought.

I decided I would gimp the entire race if needed. After all, my heart is in it for the Pro (Doug) and Paul, Meggie Dial's father, who both are fighting Parkinson's Disease.

All of the money raised from the 5K and golf tournament this weekend is going to the Parkinson's Disease Foundation.

I've only met Doug a few times and I've never met Paul, but I felt so connected to them this morning.

I'm running-walking-gimping-crawling for them.

Whatever it takes, I'll finish this race with them in my heart.

"I decided I'm doing the race," I told Justin. "People like Doug and Paul fight harder than me...experience more pain than me..on a daily basis. I'm doing this for them."

In my heart.

Determined to finish.

 So, Bandit and I started to stretch and get ready for the our run.

Playing.

Stretching together.

The rain started to pick up, but I tried to keep my spirits bright.

When we got to the Elk's, we pulled in next to an older couple.

"I sure hope they are walking," I joked. "I need some walking buddies."

Never would I imagine that I would be crossing the finish line with this older man (and his wife would kick our butt's!!). I'll get to that part soon.

Everyone loved my cape- and Bandit. He was SUCH a ham (just like his mother).

He was running up to everyone and giving kisses like they were going out of style.

Rodger, bless him, taped up my heel before the run. We sneaked into the ballroom...and that was when my first dose of inspiration hit.

Justin and I celebrated our wedding reception in this hall.
I can't believe it'll be two years in May.

After I was taped up, I had about five minutes before the race would start.

I ran into Doug.

He looked tired and weak. The disease is certainly started to take a toll on him. My heart melted and I wanted nothing more than to give him a giant hug.

He probably thought I was about to flash him when I pulled up my shirt and said, "DOUG - Look what I made for you!"

He read my shirt and gave me the biggest smile..."Wow," he said. "Thank you, man!"

I'm not sure why he called me man, but it made me laugh.

"That's awesome," he said still smiling. "Good luck out there!"

Another dose of inspiration-support and love from Doug. I walked away and wanted to cry. This might not be a shocker to some people- who know I cry very easily- but I couldn't help myself. I was so happy that I made the decision to run for the cause. I can only imagine what Doug, Paul and their loved ones go through each and every day.

I found my biggest fan and my running partner with just a few minutes to go...

Awkward family photo.
Bandit is giving us the butt.
Justin is judging Bandit for giving us the butt.
I'm probably laughing with an adorable old man.

We walked to the start line. The rain was picking up and it was REALLY cold.

Don't let the weather defeat you, I reminded myself.

Don't let your injury defeat you either, I said. 

"This is the second year for this race," Rodger said. "And we are all here for this man."

"YAYYY DOUG!" I yelled from the back of the line.

People clapped and a few others cheered for Doug.

And with that, the race started. I was standing with Rodger's friend from high school, Greg, and his girlfriend Tammi. They were power walking the entire thing.

"Well, I think I'm going to start off running," I said to them. "If nothing else, I can say I tired."

"You go girl," they said and wished me off.

Every single step hurt. I tried not to think of the pain and pressure, but it was overwhelming. My pace was VERY slow, probably 13:30 min / mile.

And then Bandit started acting weird.

He had to poop.

And per my luck, the poop bag I had with me blew out of my pocket.

Great.

So, Bandit takes a hug dump on the golf course and I had no clue what do it.

I took off my hat and placed it just in front of the poop.

Someone laughed, "She marked the poop!"

I didn't have a choice; I didn't want an angry golfer to find me later covered in dog poop.

I did my slow jog for about a half mile and stopped for a walking break.

"Who is holding who back?," someone asked as they passed me. "The dog or the owner?"

"Oh definitely the owner," I said and tried to keep my spirits high.

I saw Bill, the older gentlemen from earlier. His wife, Marsha, was a power walking machine. She was already a quarter mile ahead of us. Keeping up with her was my goal, which proved to be unsuccessful.

Bill was carrying both of their umbrellas. He was power walking pretty fast too. And eventually, he passed me.

I was slowing down.

I needed a burst of motivation.

I thought Doug, Paul and Meggie.

Meggie is running a FULL marathon today, Ashley. Get it in gear, I told myself.

And with that, I looked at Bandit and said, "You ready buddy?"

We were coming up on Bill and he yelled back, "Are you going to pass me or what?"

"I've been trying to," I said back. "You and your wife just keep beating me."

I saw the club house and thought it was the finish line (I didn't have my watch or RunKeeper application working).

But it wasn't the finish line.

I was annoyed. 

I saw Justin.

"One more mile!" Justin said.

"Are you kidding me?" I said. "This is bullshit. I think the course is wrong," I told Justin.

He laughed at how mad I was...but that's what happens when an injured runner thinks they are almost done...then they learn 1.1 more miles to go.

I ran down the hill and then started walking for a minute. I don't know if I was hallucinating or if Justin really yelled for me..but I heard, "Keep going, Ash!"

And I took off with a light jog again.

I needed to stay motivated somehow. My foot was completely numb. And I couldn't figure out if it hurt more to walk or run.

So, I decided to play a game with myself.

Okay, if you run past that small tree- you're doing pretty good, I told myself.

If you run past that big tree, you're a rockstar....like way better than Bret Michaels.

Before I knew it, I ran past the small tree AND the big tree.

Eat your heart out Bret Michaels.

I kept running. I was beyond proud of myself at this point.

Then, I heard loud thunder and saw the BIGGEST strike of lightening.

BOOOOOMMMMM!!!!!!

Everything shook!

Bandit and I both jumped.

The lightening struck something and I saw smoke in the air.

Holy CRAP, I thought. I better run faster or I'm going to be smoking next!

I kept running, and I was coming up on Bill, who I noticed was leaning forward too much.

I looked at Bill and then whatever was smoking caught my eye again.

And by the time I looked at Bill again, he was on the ground.

"Are you okay!?" I yelled.

And started running toward him as fast as I could

I put my arm around his back.

"Hi, how are you feeling?" I asked.

"Thanks for stopping, but I don't want to hold you up," he said. "I'm fine - you just keep going."

Yeah right, I thought. You were beating me anyway, buddy.

"No, I'm going to stay here with you," I said back. "Do you want me to call someone for help?"

"No!" he demanded. "I'm fine."

He stood up and said, "Go ahead- I don't want to keep you and your dog in the rain."

"Oh we are fine!" I said. "Trust me. I am injured, so I am in no rush."

 With that said, we took off together power walking. And I was determined to never leave his side.

The rain started pouring down on us harder and the wind was picking up too.

We were coming up over a hill and I noticed he started to lean forward again. He was falling over again.

"I'm sorry, my legs are just weak," he said.

"Don't be sorry!" I said. "Let's just take a break."

So we squatted down a bit.

"I guess I should get your name," I said. "What is your name?"

"Bill," he said back.

"Well Bill, my name is Ashley and this here is Bandit," I said.

Bandit shared his love with us by shaking off his wet fur.

"Goodness Bandit, not now!" I said.

"Are you sure you don't want me to call someone for help?" I asked Bill.

"No," he said again. "Not when we are this close to finishing."

"Okay," I said, admiring his dedication.

I tried to change the subject for a minute, "Your wife sure is a rockstar! She is a power walking machine! What's her name?"

"Marsha," Bill said back to me. "And yes -she is. I don't even try to keep up with her."

We waited a few more seconds, and a golf cart drove by us while were squatting on the ground.

"Are you guys okay?" he asked.

"We are good!" Bill yelled before I could respond.

Bill seemed to be doing okay. He was talking fine, and knew where he was...I truly just think his legs were weak and the wet ground wasn't making it any easier on anyone.

"We are going to make it," I said.

I helped Bill up and asked him if he wanted to link arms. 

"No," he said - being a stubborn old man. "My legs are just tired. I'm fine."

We started walking again and he said, "I'm going to slow things down."

"I am in NO rush, Bill," I said. "We can go as slow as you want."

A few minutes later we were coming up the hill and I saw Justin and Chuck holding the stop watch, "Run, Ash! Sprint across the finish line."

But I made a promise to Bill.

We were finishing together.

So, I stood by his side and we crossed the finish line at the same time. 

Bill got first in his age group.

And I got second in my age group (there were only two of us in the group- but hey, I'm still proud!!).

Drenched, but happy that we finished strong.

Marsha came down to get Bill, "Are you okay?" she asked.

"Oh, I'm fine!" he said.

Then he looked back at me, "Thank you, Ashley. Thank you."

I almost cried, I know- I cry all of the time.

But I kept thinking about what could have happened if I wasn't out there with him.

 I realized that every second in our life matters...

you are where you should be for a reason.

I grabbed lunch with Greg, Tammi, Bill and Marsha after the race.

Marsha was, of course, the cutest. She was so happy and positive. I learned that she is avid mini marathoner. We've actually done the same races- The Indianapolis Marathon (half marathon every October in Fort Harrison State Park) and the Indy Mini marathon. I hope I'm still that active when I'm in my late 60's.

When saying goodbye, Bill said, "It was nice meeting you, Ashley. Thank you for picking me up out there... twice."

"Of course," I said. "But you helped pick me up too. You gave me motivation to finish when I really needed it."

I told you earlier that I am certain everything happens for a reason. My husband would say the reason for my careless injury was a lack of support from my shoes to handle the impact of my jump.

But I think my injury occurred so that I could finish the race with Bill by my side.

Much love,
Ashley

Creeping into a Size 12

One month ago I bought these pants:

Size 14

One month ago these pants were tight.

Today, these pants are baggy.

The best part?

I've never worn them!!!!!

There is no reason for them to baggy....EXCEPT for losing some inches on my waist line!


I am creeping into size 12 pants.

And that, my lovely blog readers, is a huge accomplishment worth celebrating!!!!!

Off to watch The Hunger Games.

The real test will be resisting the buttery popcorn later...wish me luck!

Much love,
Ashley

Miles of Motivation: 6-7

The gym was worse than Black Friday shopping tonight. It was busy. Stressful. So many sweating people, desperately looking for an open machine.

 I'm ready for it to slow down any day now...but, until then - I will continue to walk around for 10 minutes looking for an open treadmill. I will continue to be harassed by a tiny Asian woman who watched me run until my "sign-up" time was over.

But more importantly, I will continue to run my miles of motivation!!

Tonight, I did miles 6 and 7 for two beautiful ladies who not only share the same name, but the same initials!!!

Mile 6 was for Jen Royer. When I think of our friendship, these two words pop into my head: MSN Chat. Seriously, I lived on MSN Chat in middle and high school. Jen and I would talk ALL of the time on MSN Chat. Mostly about boys. Other times about losing weight. A few other times about mean girls. But mainly, about boys. I would do anything to dig up some of our old conversations...they would make good material for my book one day for sure. Jen never failed to make me laugh or smile, not matter what kind of mood I was in! :)

Recently, Jen started working out, eating healthier meals and watching her portions. She is now down 20 lbs!!!!! How amazing!!! She wants to lose 40 more lbs. I'm so stinking proud of her- she looks fantastic and she is well on her way to reaching her goals! Keep it up, Jen!!! Never stop believing in yourself!

Mile 7 was for Jen Regnier. I went to Ball State with Jen- we shared the same major (Public Relations)! In fact, I think we were both at Orientation Day at Ball State together. What a small world...Even though we are the same age, she graduated a year ahead of me because I changed my major 43 times. Sorry I wanted want to save the world and felt I had way too many options to do so! :)

Anyway, I digress.

Jen is an AMAZING runner. She can literally run a FULL marathon in about the same time that I run a half marathon. She is an inspiration to so many other runners. When I first started running, Jen gave me really great advice,"Just take it one mile at a time. Don't think about how much you have to run in total, just focus on every step. Every mile." I love it. I remind myself of this conversation EVERY single long run I have during my training.

Jen is currently training for the Boston Marathon, which you must qualifier for in order to run! Jen, you will ROCK at the Boston Marathon! I'll be cheering you on all the way from Indy.

A Boston Qualifier! :)
What an accomplishment, Jen!

So, Jen & Jen - thank you very much for being so inspirational to me and those around you. Whether it's weight loss or running, you remind me to take it one lb / mile at a time. The best and healthy way for me to meet my goals and grow.

Update: 88 people have now liked my status! 81 more miles to go!!

Much love,

Ashley

Super Bass

I'm getting pretty legit at rapping "Super Bass" by the beautiful Nicki Minaj. I'll make my video debut when I feel ready....

Who knows, I might just end up on The Ellen Show singing with this adorable little girl.

Much love,
Ashley

Goals

"Goals determine what you're going to be."

Miles of Motivation: 1-2

"If you don't use it, you lose it."

I've learned this lesson the hard way. The holidays came...and so did the weight gain. The vacation started...and so did the laziness. I was really good at working out for the first two days, but then I got sick. I could barely breathe and sleeping became the activity of choice.

And much to my surprise, by New Year's Eve...I was topping the scales. The EXACT SAME WEIGHT that I started at the year before...

I spent 3 solid minutes in the bathroom crying. Listening to people say, "Where is Ashley?"

Bawling my eyes out...that is where...I busted my ass and threw it all away at the end.

I stepped on the scale and then off again.

The number was the same.

That damn haunting number was the same...

236...

So, I came out of the bathroom bummed. I walked up to Justin and said, "I'm so upset...the scale said I weigh 236 again."

He looked me straight in the eyes and told me what I've known all along, "Only you can change that.."

Sure, I was bloated.

Sure, I was drinking.

Sure, it was the end of the day.

But that is still unacceptable.

I literally just threw all my hardwork out the window and let December defeat me.

For this reason, I did not post a before and after picture from Jan. 1, 2011 to Jan. 1, 2012. What would be different? What is so inspirational about zero pounds?

So I was depressed.

Sad.

Pissed.

So, I didn't know what to write about..didn't know what pictures to post..and didn't know how to admit to everyone how I royally bombed.

But did I bomb?

Did I really consider 2011 a failure?

I did 2 half marathons, 3 5K races and countless other miles. I hiked up a mountain with Justin and tried to run up a mountain top on our vacation.

I lost inches.

I fit into new sizes- going from a size 16 (almost 18) to a SIZE 12-14!!!!!

I joined a gym.

I ran my fastest mile at 9:51.

I did not fail in 2011. I just wasn't committed. I wasn't motivated to transform my diet...because at the end of the day, it doesn't matter how many miles I run if I am shoving high fat & high carb meals in my face every single day.

I made a decision on Saturday to stop letting food control my life.

I made a decision to keep a food journal.

Track everything.

And have a goal....last year, I just wanted to get healthy. This year, I don't want to obsess over a number, but I do want to lose 50 lbs. I want to weigh 185 lbs again.

Our first picture together. 50 lbs ago.
She will be back this year.

But it's not just about changing the number on the scale, it's about changing my life. It's about living longer so I can see my future children grow old...and I mean- I really do want to be that awesome grandma running races and doing triathlons with her grandkids.

So in order to kick off 2012, I decided to let YOU all inspire me. Motivate me. Encourage me. And more importantly, keep me accountable!

I posted this Facebook status last night: "I need some motivation so I am stealing this idea from my friend, Jenny. "Like" my status and I will complete a mile in your honor in the next 30 days + give you a shout out on my blog when I complete it! :)"

77 "Likes" later...I'm overwhelmed with the amount of people who love, support and believe in me!

My first two miles tonight were for my friends Annette Chmieleski and Daniel Malinski.

When doing my first mile, I was  thinking of the first time I met Annette. She was wearing a tutu. Obviously, I loved her from the beginning. It was Halloween. I wasn't sure who she was supposed to be, but she was very friendly and we kicked it off right away. She told me that she had previously read my blog and thought it was really inspiring. What? Me? How cool...we then began to share running stories.


Half way through my mile, I started thinking about my hopes for her this year; I'm very positive  2012 will be a great year for Annette. She is a beautiful and intelligent woman and I am thrilled that she was the first person to like the status. Who knows, we might even do a race together in 2012!


My second mile was dedicated to my Twitter friend Dan aka @cubicledad - we connected on Twitter and I was instantly impressed with his running story. When I was running, The Biggest Loser was on the TV. But instead of watching the show, I was blocking out the sound. And instead of focusing on the timer...I kept repeating this number in my head...


100.


100.


100.


He lost 100 lbs in one year by training for the Chicago Marathon. HOW AMAZING is that!?! Even more inspiring, he is a member of the Start! Running Team through the American Heart Association- and raised an amazing amount of money last year- nearly $12,000. He was running for his health...and also his daughter. You can read about Dan and his story on his blog: http://cubicledadruns.com/


Thank you Annette and Dan for pushing me to kick off this goal. And for the other 75 of you, I'm coming after you...one mile at a time!


Much love,
Ashley

Top 12 in 2012

Happy New Year! It's hard to believe that another year has flown by...When I think about 2011, the word that comes to mind is change. I made a lot of changes...to my mind, body and outlook on life.

I cried many times, but I laughed many more times.

Some days I ran so slow that it made me want to give up. Other days I ran so hard that I wanted to throw up.

There were moments, many moments, when I had to pull myself off the couch, brave the cold weather and drive my moody self to the gym.

But on other days, I was so motivated I was bursting at the seams of my soul.

At least 40.3 times, I pulled in a fast food drive thru -only to pull out a few moments later, realizing I didn't need nor want those extra calories. But in even more instances, I fell off the wagon and stuffed my face with burgers and fries. And dipped both of them in ranch.

On the toughest of days, I would break down and scream at Justin; yelling that I never wanted to eat a piece of grilled chicken again. Other weeks, I could eat grilled chicken for every single meal.

In one week, I could lose 5 lbs and then the next week I could gain 7. It was a constant battle. My weight will always be a constant battle.

But through it all, I learned a lot. About weight loss. About running. About fitness. About healthy eating. About myself.

I've had a few special requests for a blog post about my weight loss (and gain) journey in 2011. If you are looking for a blog post that will help you accomplish your new years resolutions, this isn't the right post. Rather, this is a blog post about tips for living a healthy lifestyle- not for a few months or until you hit a certain weight, but for a lifetime! I'm not a pro at this...people are healthier than me...smarter than me...and in better shape than me. But these 12 tips reflect what worked for me over the past year.

Without further adieu, here are my Top 12 Tips for Living a Healthy Lifestyle in 2012: 

Believe in yourself. This is the most important step of all. Attitude is everything. If you have no faith in yourself and your abilities, you will not not succeed. You must believe you worth it. You must love your body now, and believe it can only get better. Stronger. Healthier. Because if I can go from being a workaholic couch bum with "no time to workout" to someone who dedicates time to fitness and runs three half marathons and three 5ks within 13 months, then I KNOW you can too.

Find inspiration. I am a firm believer in inspiration. It does amazing things. Seek out people, blogs, stories, and events that inspire you. There will be days when you will feel hopeless and lost, and you will want to give up. But if you surround yourself with positive, inspiring people-  you will pick yourself up very quickly when you fall down. People who inspire me include Meggie Dials (@meggiehd) and her husband / my co-worker Josh Dials (@jtdials) - both of them have amazing stories about their running journey. Josh is always asking me how my running is going, what races I have coming up and sending me positive bursts of inspiration - even if he doesn't know it. And he is the healthiest eater I have EVER met in my entire life. Seriously, just walking by his desk and seeing his giant, healthy salad makes me stay on track. And Meggie- holy cow- just met her once and you will FALL in love with her! She is positive, feisty and a ball of inspiration. But stay away from her cake balls, they are as addicting as her fun personality. You can read about her running journey and life here: www.seemeggierun.com. Another blog that inspires me (and I find myself reading daily is): http://one-twenty-five.tumblr.com. She is an incredible writer and exposes the ups and downs of weight loss and running. She is beautiful. Follow her journey and get inspired for life.

When you first start running, focus on distance or speed. This is the best advice I ever received from my inspiration queen, Meggie, which is another point...don't be afraid to ask for advice!! I always ask for advice and for people to tell me their stories!! When I first started running, Meggie told me to pick between distance or speed. I picked distance. I would rather go 5 miles at  14 minute pace than run a 7 minute mile. Why? Because at the end of the day I'm working out for a lot longer...pushing my body to new limits. One day I'll hit that 7 minute mile (okay, maybe 8:30 mile) but still...in the meantime, I am getting stronger and faster....and going longer distances. BUT maybe you want to work on your speed, so focus on your time. But for me, 2011 was about not obsessing over a number. So, this was the best advice and best decision I made for becoming a better runner.

Buy new workout clothes and good running shoes. The better you look, the better you feel. The same is true with fitness and working out, the more comfortable you are, the better you perform. On Dec. 26, 2010, I spent all my money from Christmas at Dick's Sporting Goods. I got new running tights, pants and shirts. I looked at it like I was making an investment in my health and my goals.

Drink LOTS of water. I can't stress this enough...when you are working out and running, you are sweating. And if you sweat your ass off in a snow storm like I do, then you will sweat even more when you are working out. You need hydration (water) to stay healthy and last longer in your workouts. Also, you will be less sore and have fewer headaches if you pump your body with water. I drink at every meal, have a glass of water (or 5) by my night stand, and drink it all throughout the day. If only I could give up my diet coke addiction...hey, I am a work in progress. So how much water should you drink each day? The Institute of Medicine determined that an adequate intake (AI) for men is roughly 3 liters (about 13 cups) of total beverages a day. The AI for women is 2.2 liters (about 9 cups) of total beverages a day.

Try to go vegetarian for a few meals each week. There are some really amazing vegetarian meals out there...and I'll be posting a blog soon with a few of my favorite vegetarian recipes. But your body doesn't need all the processed foods and meats. So, try to eat earthy at least once a day (that is only 5 meals a week). A few ways to do this are: fruit for breakfast, veggie stir fry,  veggie sandwiches, (Jimmy Johns Veggie is the BEST!!!), spinach and mushroom etouffee is unbelievable, black bean nachos or tacos, vegetable soup, and nothing beats a good salad! :) If you need some more veggie recipe ideas, ask my great friend Brittany Gerig -she knows a lot of healthy and delicious recipes!

Start slow - you are only racing against yourself! Another friend who inspires me is Melanie Allen (@mel_allen). She gave me the best advice during my first race. "Don't look at other people around you; you are only racing against yourself." People will pass you - just like you will pass other people. Don't compare yourself to other people - you will be miserable. Someone will always be faster, stronger, more talented- but as Maya Angelou once told me and hundreds of other people, "No more is more human than you. You can do anything."  The run never gets easier, you just get better, faster and stronger. Don't be upset if you have slow days, you are still moving your body. I had some days when I would go to the gym and just walk. I wasn't feeling it, but I wanted to put in my time and miles. So I would walk and then run for a few minutes. Just keep moving. Don't give up. No matter how fast you go, you are still miles ahead of everyone on the couch.

Drink black coffee and green tea. I once read that drinking one cup of coffee with sugar and cream everyday will pack on 15 lbs a year. Maybe 10. But either way, that's a lot of weight to gain just from drinking one cup of coffee. And who really drinks ONE cup of coffee? It takes some getting used to, but I drink my coffee black most of the time. Or I'll add sugar free syrup. Americanos from Starbucks are heavenly. I also try to drink green tea in the afternoon or morning (if I don't drink coffee). Green tea has been proven to boast your metabolism! Drink up my friends!

Stop using condiments. When I first learned that I had a lactose sensitivity, I thought my world ended. Cheese makes EVERYTHING better. Burgers, pasta, pizza - it all needs cheese. But look at those items I just listed...most of them are unhealthy. If you are opting for healthier items in your diet, giving up fatty condiments like cheese and mayo won't be that hard. You don't need to pile on cheese and mayo with a veggie stir fry..they simply don't go together. If you want to add some flavor to your grilled chicken, try adding mustard -regular! Honey mustard is often made with mayo...so take it easy on that...and ketchup is the evil step sister to mayo because it's PACKED with sugar. If you are a ranch addict like me, there is help. Check out yogurt ranch dressing from Bolthouse Farms! It's half of the calories of regular ranch and tastes pretty good! Yes, it's slightly more expensive..but isn't living longer and healthier worth a few extra dollars.

Make commitments. Sign for a race, a gym membership, or start writing about your journey.Your commitments will keep you on track, accountable and inspired. If you want to go a race and are afraid to do it alone, PLEASE email me!! I'll gladly do any race with me (given I'm available) - and it's not like I travel the world for my job. I'd LOVE to do a race with you!!

Start cooking at home and packing your lunch. My good friend Sarah Frey (@sarahfrey6) is great at this! She often cuts up her veggies and fruit for the week on Sunday evening. I'm so inspired by her commitment to eating healthy and cooking new dishes at home! Not only does packing your lunch and cooking at home save you calories, but it saves you money! The Internet is FULL of healthy and fun recipes to try out at home.

Watch your sodium! If you are retaining water, you are probably consuming too much sodium. According to the Mayo Clinic Website, The 2010 Dietary Guidelines for Americans recommend limiting sodium to less than 2,300 mg a day — or 1,500 mg if you're age 51 or older, or if you are black, or if you have high blood pressure, diabetes or chronic kidney disease. Consider that just one teaspoon of table salt has 2,325 milligrams (mg) of sodium. The vast majority of sodium in the typical American diet comes from foods that are processed and prepared. These foods are typically high in salt, which is a combination of sodium and chloride, and in additives that contain sodium. Processed foods include bread, prepared dinners like pasta, meat and egg dishes, pizza, cold cuts and bacon, cheese, soups, and fast foods." So, what should you do? Try to eat fresh as often as possible! Freeze your own veggies and meals

Good luck in 2012!

And remember, whatever your goals are for this year...."Decide that you want it more than you are afraid of it." - Bill Cosby

Much love,

I am a Runner

My husband has slowly turned into my personal trainer. We got a gym membership together at the YMCA in October, but we never really worked out together. I always focused on cardio while he focused on strength training with some cardio.

But since I am not currently training for a race, I wanted to build strength training back into my workout routine. Often, people assume they should only focus on cardio. But strength training is SO important…sure I want to continue to lose weight. But I also want to say goodbye to my bat wings, saddle bags and love handles.  Hence, I need to start lifting again to tone up! And I also believe with a stronger core, back and leg muscles – I will improve my running posture. 

So last night, Justin and I were doing legs.  We were on the calf raise machine when I first said it. Previously, we were doing sets of 10 – but I was feeling good so I just did a set of 15.

“Did you just do 15?” Justin asked.

I looked over at him with a cocky smirk and said, “Yes, I am a runner.”

I’ve never said that before. Ever. I usually say, "I run." Or, "I try to run!"

To be honest, it’s hard for me to feel like a “runner” because I can’t run for miles and miles without stopping.

But then I found this picture and quote a few weeks ago. 

Yes, I take walking breaks. Yes, I do intervals of walking and running- because for now, that works. For now, that’s what helps me log more miles. So, I might stop for a walking break, but I keep running. I keep running until I finish. Whether I get a personal best or the worst time of my life, I still run. 

On the next set, I went to lift up and the weight felt increased. Dramatically. It was now at 150 lbs.

“You turd,” I said.  

Justin smirked and gave me this look of “try to do 15 reps now” – so I accepted the challenged. And then some.

I exhaled, and lifted up…doing the most weight I’ve ever done on a calf raise.  

And with confidence in myself and my mental strength on full blast, I did 20 reps.

“You’re a punk,” Justin said.

Well, that might be true.

"I'm a runner," I said back.  It felt amazing to say that twice. Outloud. And I meant it.

"Just wait until arm days," he said. "I'll get you then..."

And he will - the bat wings can't lift heavy duty. YET!

***

Later that night, I was watching The Biggest Loser. It was the marathon episode, which is MY favorite!

While the makeover episode is amazing to see their physical transformation, this episode makes the contestants shine more than EVER before. You can put make up on anyone, but no new dress or hair cut will ever make someone feel the high of finishing a full marathon. Especially someone, who just five months earlier, was considered morbidly obese… I cried so many happy tears last night!

Those contestants braved the heat of the desert and plowed through sand storms…for 26.2 miles…let’s just say I was beyond inspired! I wanted to be at the finish line hugging and crying with each contestant as they crossed the finish line.

I was also so inspired by Roman’s  confidence.

He went into this race saying, “I am going to win!” 

“Nothing can stop me from winning this race.” 

“I will pass Courtney.”

"I will be in the final 3!"

Those are just a few things Roman said during his interview about the full marathon.

With that attitude and confidence, he won the race. Sure, he was prepared and trained for the race…but that confidence. That attitude…that is what won him the race.

You could have trained your heart out…never missed a day…but if you do not believe in yourself and your abilities…others will quickly pass you by.

Go win your race.

Much love,

Ashley

Giving Like Grandma Kaye

Today, I was thinking about Christmas gifts for the children that I tutor with at Indy School on Wheels. I have to give something that I can give to all the children. No child will (nor should ever) be left out. I would like to give something creative. Something to pass the time. Something they can do together. Something to make them smile.


I thought of the gifts I received when I was their age…and then the perfect gift popped into my mind.

Coloring books and crayons.

Every year for as long as I can remember, my Grandma Kaye got us coloring books and crayons for Christmas.

“I don’t care how old you get,” Grandma Kaye would say. “I don’t care if you are married…both you and your husband will be getting color books and crayons at Christmas from Grandma Kaye.”

It made me smile. A perfect present from the one of the most giving woman I have ever met in my life. Seriously. She has LITERALLY tried to give me the shirt off her back before…

“Honey girl... I bought this shirt, but I don’t know if I like it,” she would say. “I definitely think it’s YOU!”

Oh me. Oh my. Have you ever tried to tell your grandma to keep her shirt on? Yes, I have. Grandma Kaye, God love ya!

Celebration drink with Grandma Kaye at my college graudation party.

Smiling with Grandma Kaye at Grandpa's 70th Birthday party.

Grandma Kaye dancing..and being the life of the party!!

Grandma giving me a hug after I became Mrs. Sieb.

So, for Christmas this year- I want to give the kiddos at Indy School on Wheels something special. I want to get each of them a coloring book, their own set of crayons and a candy cane or other Christmas inspired treat. Inside each coloring book, I will include an inspirational quote or message. Maybe I will write something different each time. Maybe it will be the same message. I haven’t decided what I will write yet.

I just want them to feel special. Because they are.

I just want them to smile. Because it melts my heart.

I just want them to understand that you can give someone something special without spending a lot money. Because the best things in life are free.

I just want them to believe that there are better days ahead. Because their future is bright.

I just want them to be a kid. Because too many of these children are stripped from their childhood and forced to grow up too soon.

Much love,

Ashley

30 Days of Thanks: Day 6

"The best love is the kind that awakens the soul; that makes us reach for more, that plants the fire in our hearts and brings peace to our minds. That's what I hope to give you forever." - The Notebook

Today, I am thankful for my husband.

Who challenges me.

Who makes me a better person.

Who loves me at worst - and even more at my best.

Who cooks better than anyone I know.

Who smiles and melts my heart.

Who still gives me butterflies when he kisses me and says, "I missed you today."

Who was waiting for me at the finish line of my half marathon- even though he barely made it because traffic was so bad (he literally made it with 3 minutes to spare).

"ASHLEY!" I heard him yell from the crowd. I looked up and saw him right away.

I felt like I was going to puke because my body hurt so bad. Everywhere.

But I was so excited because I hit my goal.

He came running up to the fence and gave me the biggest kiss on the lips and wrapped his arms around me. Thank God because I wanted to collapse.

"YOU DID IT!" He said.

"I think I am going to puke," I said. "OMG, I did it..." Then I grabbed the pole for support.

I REALLY DID IT!

I reached for my phone and posted to my Facebook,"I hit my goal!!!!"

"Okay, now where is Jimmy Johns?" I said ready to plow through some food.

***

Later that day, we were driving home to Decatur for my sister's birthday.

He leaned over, grabbed my hand and placed my hand on his lips.

"I really am so proud of you," he said with the biggest smile on his face and bright glow in his eyes.

"Aww thanks babe, I love you! I am so glad you were there!"

"You are truly the most amazing and inspiring person I've ever met..." he said.

Forever thankful.

Much love,
Ashley

30 Days of Thanks: Days 1 to 3

I wanted to jump on board with this writing project I saw start up on Facebook called, “30 Days of Thanks.” I’d love for you to join me. Even if you don’t have a blog, I encourage you to write these down in your own personal journal. Even better, call the person you are thankful for and let them know why you feel that way. Because I missed the first 2 days, I am going to combine 3 days into one post.

November 1

My sister found out a few weeks ago that her skin cancer biopsy came back abnormal. For a week straight, I tried to remain calm. I tried to remind her not to worry until she could visit the doctor for an explanation. And I prayed every single day.

We found out last week that she needs to surgery done to remove more of the abnormal cells. November 18th. That’s when she will have surgery. Please continue to pray until we can officially rule out cancer.

On that note, I’m thankful for everyone has prayed for my sister’s health. I truly do not know what I would do with my sister. We are completely opposite people. She is shy. I am loud. She is short. I am tall. She likes chicken strips. I like cheeseburgers. She hates seafood. I would eat sushi every single day of my life. But I believe our differences make us a perfect match. Her birthday is this Saturday, November 5- the same day I run my third half marathon within 13 months. The cool thing? On Saturday, we will both be 24 years old until I turn 25 just six days later on Nov. 11. We used to fight about having to celebrate our birthdays on the same day, but now – I am looking forward to it more than anything.

My sister and I eat dinner at Grandma's house.
She is using her hand as an appetizer and I have the most beautiful mullet in the world.

November 2

It was more than a year ago. I’m thinking September of 2010. I was at the doctor’s office. I stepped on the scale and I weighed 236 lbs. I wanted to make her weigh me again. Was that a joke? I hadn’t weighed myself in a long time, but I didn’t realize I had gained that much weight. It was a scary moment. A biggest loser moment …but at the start of the season when everyone cries and gets emotional and reflects on how they came to be that overweight.

How did I let myself go? What happened to the girl who worked out an hour a day no matter what? Where did the girl go who used to eat salads like they were going out of style and swore off sweets and fried foods?

She was gone.

That healthy girl was long gone.

The doctor told me that day I needed to lose weight. With diabetes and heart disease in my family, I absolutely needed to lose weight. I was on the fast track to heart failure and diabetes and if I didn’t change my eating habits and start working out immediately. Not Monday. Not tomorrow. Now. I needed to make changes now. At first I was in denial, but by the new year I was ready to make big changes.

2011 was an amazing year for me in terms of my health. It was NOT easy.

I did struggle.

I did want to give up at times.

I did get injured.

I did gain watch my weight change like the ocean tides. Big loss one day. Little loss the next day or even weeks.

BUT,

I am stronger.

I am faster.

I am more confident.

I am making healthier decisions about food and drinks on a daily basis.

I am growing up and picking a morning run over a night of partying.

For the year, I am about 20 lbs down. I would LOVE to lose 10 more lbs this year. But I made a decision from the beginning not to let a number determine my happiness and dictate all of my goals. In fact, I focused on making huge fitness goals, ate more grilled chicken & veggies than you could ever imagine and reduced the amount of cheese that I consumed. The last one was the hardest because cheese has its own food group in my eyes. And soy cheese / rice cheese / veggie cheese just doesn’t compare. You can read about my cheese fights here. http://ashleysieb.blogspot.com/2011/03/image-issues-cheese-fights-and-bride.html

I have a long ways to go, but I thankful for my doctor telling me that it was time to stop saying tomorrow and start making changes today. She wasn’t harsh or in my face about it, but she was very honest and open about the realities of my health.

I will look like this again, soon. I was 195 lbs here! Only 27 more lbs to go!

November 3

Me, Sarah Frey (then Sarah Sampson) and Toni Suarez - freshman year of college.
Lifelong friends, without a doubt.

I was half-awake when I let Bandit out this morning at 6:45 a.m. That’s when I noticed a handwritten envelope on the table. I came home late last night so I didn’t have chance to look through the mail. I looked at the return address on the card and it said, “The Frey’s.” I smiled.

Inside the card, which she sent for no reason at all, she wrote a beautiful message and included a recipe for something pumpkin (I was too tired to read the recipe card, but all I needed to know was PUMPKIN and I was sold!!). It was the sweetest random act of kindness and it meant so much to me, especially because just days before I wrote a post about the importance of letting family and friends know how much you care about them… http://ashleysieb.blogspot.com/2011/10/lesson-in-friendship.html

I’m thankful for my friend Sarah, who took the time out of her day and few cents out of her pocket, to mail me the most thoughtful card for absolutely no reason at all. I’m so honored to be your friend. You are doing amazing things in your life right now and this world is truly a better place because you are here. Never change.

Until tomorrow….

Much love,

Ashley